Ready to win some Beta Keys?

Discussion in 'Off-Topic' started by Megadestructo, Jan 24, 2013.

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  1. agadoijo

    agadoijo Kobold

    Oh my oh my so many incredible moments... which one to chose?!

    Well while playing D&D in a really small adventure that was made by an old friend to introduce D&D to some new friends.
    We were near the end of the story, after defeating the evil wizard, the job was not done yet there was still a spell at work that was affecting the all village.
    The only way to end the spell was to spoke the mystical words at the altar that we add collect over the adventure.
    The words were scrambled the team brainstormed and got to two possible sayings.
    I decided to take the lead and went to the altar and spoke the words in the order I believed was the correct one.
    SHABOOM! Instant death zap I was a goner!

    Oh my! The team just lost a member but the spell was still at work and everyone was still in great danger, so another player rushed to the altar and spoke the words... in the exact same order that I (the dead guy!) just had said it!
    Everyone just stared at him! "What did he just said?!?!" while he was "NO WAIT what I mean was..."
    SHABOOM! Death ray!
    HUGE laugh! Most of the players were rolling on the floor.
    Have you ever seen Monty Python and the Holy Grail? It was exactly like that scene when crossing the bridge!

    Eventually after recovering from the laughing the third player said the words in the correct order and saved everyone!

    Happy ending with two dead players!
     
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  2. Lekon

    Lekon Kobold

    I've had many wonderful memories RPing in various games, each time I moved as a kid, I'd get to meet new folk. The avatar I'm sporting is a representation of Seer Lekon, who was me when I worked for Origin systems writing quests and events for awhile. (Before EA came in and took over Origin, but that's another story).

    My favorite memory was the golf trip, in Ultima Online. We decided that Britannia was going to be our golf course. Three of us total, who had rather nothing better to do than engage in some silly RP decided to put on bright green berets, neon shirts, and kilts, then would be wielding long axes (Looked just like golf clubs.) and used black pearls for the balls. We'd pick random places to do this, and just walk in, drop the pearl, yell FORE! And swing the axe. Pick up the pearl, and have one of the other guys drop it a ways away to look like it had landed. Most of the fun was in RPing the arguments over what a natural lie was if it landed on a shopkeeper's stand, or what the rules said if a random orc picked up the ball. We did this a number of times, mostly because it started taking on a Pythonesque absurdity, especially when we'd show up in some of the more populated dungeons and bug adventurers to let us play through. Adding to the fun was occasionally blowing away an enemy during the game with high circle spells, chiding them for interrupting a gentleman's game.

    It was utterly silly, and I loved it. Best moment was when some other player pickpocketed the ball from one of us, and someone else yelled guards, slaying the thief. Due to UO's weird UI at the time, he used the axe on the corpse by accident, turning the thief into human pieces. "Hit the ball where it lies!" suddenly took on a horrifying connotation.
     
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  3. Sandman

    Sandman Kobold

    My first time playing D&D was actually pretty recently. My friend told me to just find a persona that I liked and act it out. Since I had just got back in to watching Pro Wrestling and I can do a spot on impersonation, naturally I became The Macho Priest Randolf Vicious. Best part of that one shot campaign was my friend summoning a magic trampoline that I used to jump high into the air, yelling "OHHHHHH YEAAHHHH! MACHO MAN'S COMMIN' FOR YAHH!", and elbow drop a dragon using a mace.
     
  4. Lorenzo

    Lorenzo Kobold

    group of me the wizard, a sorcerer, a barbarian, a warrior and a cleric. all 7th level
    we were on the sewers of our city searching for some kobolds-like creatures, i sent my imp to scout ahead while invisible and it shortly returns stating that many small creatures and 2 huge one are around the corner talking about something but it didn't hear...
    Me-Wizard: "my imp saw <blbalbal>, quick Sorcerer, throw a fireball and let's get the initiative!"
    Sorcerer: "are you sure?"
    Warrior(and king of the region) turns around the corner, stepping almost near them and says: "Excuse us, we are searching for some strange creatures on these sewers, did you know anything about it?"
    /party_mass_facepalm and the fight starts

    the fight goes on for several rounds, with new teleporting-melee demons joining the fight... we loose the sorcerer soon and we were short on spells to counter them and so we choose to retreat.
    me: "ok guys, take the sorcerer and lets get a quick retreat from the sewer!" casted HASTE
    them: "ok!"
    and they run away on their turn, with the ease of my haste, leaving me alone with some nasty teleporting deamons (can't remember the name) and a dark naga.
    me: "ok i can do this... no more teleporting spells, no more invisible ones but I'VE GOT THIS!" instead of trying to run away with haste, i use my magic crown versus the dark naga, with the power to dominate monsters/person... and i fail miserably on his will check.
    In the next turn, the three of them obliterate me but i was fast enough to yell at my invisible imp, always on my side, to run and search for help just before they killed me.
    Of course the group came back to get my corpse, naked and without any magic item on it.

    I was so damn pissed for it and of course, they all laughed for me. :D
     
  5. Daemyx

    Daemyx Kobold

    We were playing Vampire: the Masquerade, the whole party was riding on a train and we were also being hunted by werewolves. When we were about to leave the wagon at the door was a naked woman. I (and I guess the rest too) was like "WTF". And when she noticed our silver weapons she said "Do you think those toys can harm me, Wyrm slaves?". I almost shat myself. The fear was in everyone faces. We can't face a werewolf now, someone is gonna die for sure. Then the narrator role the dice for the metamorphosis (he rolled like 7 die)... and failed the test. So he said "And she just stand still in front of you...". His sadness matched with our relief when we killed her in no time.
     
  6. This one is actually a hilarious death.
    Somehow the party ends up fighting a Purple Worm and in case you didn't know, they swallow people whole.
    Which it did...
    So, here i am, inside the worm, trying to slash my way out of his stomach, get some good sneak attacks(being inside a worm tends to negate his dex).
    At some point the worm goes unconscious and i'm almost dead and our paladin has the great idea to try and help me out by slashing the worm from the outside.
    This is what happened, he rolls a 1, hits me through the worm, crits and decapitates me.
    Paladins...can't trust 'em with anything!
     
  7. Qfasa

    Qfasa Kobold

    It's actually from the MMO Age of Conan but I hope it's good. I used to play on the PVP server and one day stranger came up to me and started telling me about his guild and how great it is and rich and mighty. After that he asked me "Do you want to join us?". Those days my English was even worse than it's now (and sadly it's still not so good) but I caught up a bit of his roleplay spirit and instead of just "no, thanks" told him (with a lots of mistake I'm sure) that I'd like to, but I can't because I'm from the distant land and can't speak properly with him and his people. He told something like "I understand. It's sad that you've rejected our offer, because I can't let you live now, when you know so much about our guild". Well, it was PVP server and he was much better than me, so few seconds later I was dead.
    May be it's just me, but I smile every time I remember that moment.
     
  8. Hallas

    Hallas Mushroom Warrior

    I first played a pen & paper pretty recently, actually. It was at encounters for D&D 4ed at a local shop and I was totally unsure what to expect with these people I've never met. It turned out to be great fun! The dwarf in our party was the best, but only because of our minotaur cleric. See, the cleric hated getting into the thick of things, so he routinely toss the dwarf head-first (because of his horned helmet which the minotaur had to accept relunctantly) into mobs of minions to soak up all the hits. It was quite convienent for the dwarf, as his large shield had a mug of ale attached on the inside of it so he could take a swig for every blow that fell upon his shield. I couldn't help but be entertained :)
     
  9. Truhlsrohk

    Truhlsrohk Kobold

    The time I came up against a blind Beholder, only at the time I didn't realise it was blind........ Took me ages to decide how to try and get past it... The DM was even giving small hints like making it bump into things..... The team just didn't get the hints..... We laughed ourself silly when we finally found out... Oh, he was a friendly Beholder too.......
     
  10. zz_tophat

    zz_tophat Kobold

    The day I retired my lawful evil rogue/fighter Dath, the Karsite.

    It was my last day playing with that group, as I was moving the next day. Dath had been the sole survivor of 2 brutal party wipes and I had changed his alignment from chaotic neutral due to him taking on a "only the strong survive" mentality.

    We entered a castle on a lake of lava, there were traps, monsters and the DM's own creation: lava zombies. Dath struck a friendship with our highly competent cleric, a (new player that proved to be a fantastic role player and a really good cleric). Dath and the cleric traded philosophical jabs at each other over their opposed view points but remained amiable because while Dath was in it for the money and the cleric was there to stop the evils of the great lava lich they made a good team. They made such a good team they quickly became the dynamic duo of the group. Over coming the all the obstacles in their path with the unbeatable power of friendship.

    The final battle was a hard one but thanks to team coordination we overcame the lich at the seat of his power. 2 of our other party members died during the conflict and a third was turned to stone, only Dath and the cleric were left standing. We prepared to move the dead and stoned back to town to raise them in safety and found the phylactery in a chest with other goodies behind the throne room. Rather than carry the cursed object around Dath made the decision to destroy it on the spot.

    Turns out it was also the cornerstone of the enchantment keeping the castle afloat on the lake of lava.

    Go figure.

    Despite his misgivings about it, Dath agreed to carry one of the dead, after a hasty argument wherein the cleric pointed out he could be useful in the future. The cleric shouldered the other and unfortunately the poor stoned barbarian was left to his fate. Dath and the cleric made their way back through the castle, hounded by newly spawned lava zombies and rising lava blocking paths. However on reaching the entry hall, the last barrier to freedom the dynamic duo encountered a small horde of the ever persistent lava zombies. The cleric, ever brave, shouted: then we will die on our feet! He drew steel and prepared to fight his way through, Dath, ever his stalwart companion also drew his weapon and rolled initiative. Dath suggested they drop one of the bodies as a distraction and flee but the cleric would do no such thing (and the DM reminded dath that lava zombies don't eat dead, they flood the veins of the still living with their molten ichor and turn them in to a burning undead like them.)

    Improved initiative is a great feat for getting the jump on people, those few extra points on top of a decent dexterity score can make all the difference, on top of a feat like improved trip it can lead to a very nice wombo combo of sorts. A thing I am sure that cleric came to appreciate in the first round of combat as his stalwart companion tripped him and tumbled past the phalanx of undead, leaving him as "still living" bait.

    The cleric died with the recall spell on his lips, burned to ash by the merciless undead.
    Dath walked away from the sinking castle, his last adventure, again as the only survivor.

    I still have his sheet.

    I don't even remember the cleric's name.



    EDIT: sorry, I could not fit that in a paragraph, it just wouldn't work.
     
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  11. Mollarom

    Mollarom Kobold

    So I'm playing Junn the barbarian, and my other party member is Saraquin the wizard. Saraquin charms a goblin during a dungeon delve. Junn doesn't like that. Junn attacks the goblin. The goblin escapes and dutifully tells Saraquin. Saraquin responds by levitating Junn high into the air, saying he'll let him down when he apologizes to "Gob." Junn throws a sword in retaliation, which misses. Saraquin shrugs his shoulders, kills the spell, and Junn falls to his death.

    A few days later, Gob gives Saraquin a necklace made of Junn's fingerbones. Saraquin squeals with delight. "Shake the fingerbone necklace" became a common phrase at our gaming table. Saraquin eventually packed the fingerbone necklace with enough spells to make it an artifact.
     
  12. AtomicBarfly

    AtomicBarfly Kobold

    The moment, or campaign, that springs to mind for me happened a couple of years ago. We were playing the brand new Dresden Files RPG and having a blast. We'd spent the last week taking our lovely city and putting a supernatural spin on it. I had even gone out and purchased a guidebook for our city that covered all of the local myths, hauntings and general weirdness as precious GM fuel.

    There were a lot of great moments in this particular game, but the one I am most proud of was to do with a haunting. Victoria has a maritime museum and one of its claims to fame is that it is one of the most haunted places in the city. The museum is haunted by none other than Sir Mathew Begbie aka The Hanging Judge. In his esteemed career he had 27 men hanged, thieves and murders all, and one dark night in our supernaturally twisted city our players needed to pull off a heist. You see, as a component for a thaumaturgic ritual the PCs needed a sea serpent's bone and it just so happened that the museum had some hanging from the ceiling in the shape of a whale skeleton. In the dark of night one of the PCs broke into the museum while the others stood guard. He slipped to the uppermost floor in order to get at the suspended bones and it was at this point that there was a sharp drop in temperature. The Hanging Judge had come to met out justice on the thief and a shadowy noose materialized around the neck of our would-be hero. With a solid push the character was left dangling and chocking. The other PCs ran to his aid and, ultimately, it was the mage that saved the day. He was able to, with great effort, magically keep the thief from dying while the vampire and changeling battled the ghost. They all walked away that night along with the bones, but they had learned a valuable lesson about researching local hauntings before they went skulking.

    Bonus: In the same game as above there was also a gang of local pedicab drivers that we affectionately called The Pediboys. They had an ongoing feud with the changeling player because she had refused to tip one of them and they would frequently attempt to menace her when nobody else was looking. We thought this was hilarious and, to this day, still gets mentioned at our table.
     
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  13. TotalNerd

    TotalNerd Kobold

    I was a GM in D&D for my 11th birthday. My friends were attempting to take back a town conquered by kobolds and orcs, and as they stepped into a ruined tavern, I pulled out my mystical voice and started detailing plot lines.

    I explained that they could see an orc champion standing over a pit, and that this champion had one HUGE leg that could send people sprawling backwards.

    When kicked into the pit, players broke pretty much every bone in their body, and they had to get an 15 or higher on die roll to get out.

    Turns out, during the encounter, my friends all had special dwarven abilities that not only kept them from being pushed around, but actually pushed me back.

    With 2 lucky rolls, my friends rolled a 20 and a 16, enough to throw my mighty orc champion in the pit. The amazing part, you ask? That I never hit them, not once.

    Stupid Dwarves.
     
  14. Thirandras

    Thirandras Kobold

    Our party was hiding from a Green Dragon that was strongly flapping his wings to fly away in a deep forest, when the wizard in our party had the "brilliant" idea of conjuring a massive fireball.... The result? The wind started by the flapping of the wings made the fireball come back right at us, making all the party suffer the damage from the fireball and perishing in the process.... (Never trust a Wizard.... I´d say...)
     
  15. TotalNerd

    TotalNerd Kobold

    That is hilarious. (And I agree, wizards are not to be trusted.)
     
  16. Thirandras

    Thirandras Kobold

    You have no idea how much we cursed the player afterwards....
     
  17. maxmazzel

    maxmazzel Kobold

    A Dnd session where we pretty much got blasted away by a Mature Red Dragon. We ran into a smal room, almost as soon as we closed the door our Minotaur warrior died due to fire. When we realized the door did not have a lock we had to ''improvise''. So my rogue friend and I looked each other in the eye, as the dwarven priest was about to heal the Minotaur we simultainiously yelled at him to stop and we picked up his body and shoved his horns into the door and used him as a barricade. You wouldn't believe the look the player gave us, as if we had always wanted to desecrate his remains XD.
     
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  18. Mistborn

    Mistborn Kobold

    This was many PCs ago, and I was a snappy youngster, so bare with me. I am not the evil gamer now that I once was.....

    Me and a couple friends decided that we had become tired of the gankfest that Ultima Online had become. Leaving town without an army behind you was a death wish.

    Our boredom devolved into a cold blooded murder, and a story that I will forever remember fondly.

    One night, not much different than most in UO, three beautiful female characters by the name of Laquisha, Shaniqua, and Shanaynay sprang into existence and moved into town. These three woman were entrepreneurs determined to make their mark on the world. You can easily imagine their hairstyles and body choices, selections mostly found from the seedy far right end of the character creation slider bars. A fake prostitution ring was the promising business of choice, and the women soon lined up outside town ready to wait for their first customers/victims. Five seconds later the first hero approached. Within a minute there was a line. It was a nasty mix of awkwardness, hilarity, and disgust that we felt playing these parts and seeing their responses, but we had a job to do. Upon finding just the right player type, a trusting do gooder, our pimp sprang out of the bushes and started chatting him up. Shanaynay rifled through his pack and hit the jackpot....a house key. She had just enough time to loot it before the ruse was up. She bolted for town and the safety of the instateleporting guards. His curses were long and heated, he was definitely not a happy customer. We had the key but had no idea where the house was located. A shady deal was struck. He would lead us to the house and we would check it out, take what we wanted, and give the key back. Poor fellow. Upon entering the house he was magically attacked by all three women and their pimp. He got out a "whaaaaa" and killed Laquisha with a halberd before falling. The house was ours, but this gullible traveler would get his revenge. We would log in and go about our business as usual, using the house as our new headquarters. But not all was well. Strange noises and moans of "OOOooooOooo" would be seen here and there inside the house. It turns out that he did not choose to pass on into the afterlife and resurrect new, and instead remained a ghost haunting the house randomly for as long as we owned it.

    Those were the good times.
     
  19. GeeWhiz

    GeeWhiz Kobold

    I only played a couple of times but I remember that we were being chased by some fire elementals. We had found some magical jewels and we invoked them and Kermit the Frog appeared along with some others in his gang (yes the GM was a bit crazy - laugh). Anyway the last jewel we had he told me we could get anything we wanted. So I asked for a fire truck and the muppets jumped on the truck and chased those bad, bad fire elementals all over the dungeon. The green frog, fozzy the bear, miss piggy, they were a sight to behold!

    Yes, my character died laughing (well not really but I want a beta key).

    :>)
     
  20. Drinno

    Drinno Kobold

    **The Rift** During my 1st D&D experience I played a rogue, and while island hopping in our recently acquired ship (complete with sentient ballista) we came across a Dwarven slaver ship who engaged us in a naval battle. This was new to us all, and boring for the majority as we only had 2 players (a ranger and fighter) capable of launching arrows to the other deck. After what seemed an eternity we managed to board the vessel and dispatch several formidable dwarfs to claim the loot and whatever else was below. What was found was 40 Goblin slaves chained to the oars.. The group then spent the next 3 hours sitting around a table drinking beers with half wanting to sell the goblins back to slavers, and the other half wanting to return them to their homeland. It began to get quite heated and we kept going around in circles and it began causing a genuine rift in the group.. I was new to the group, had no previous D&D experience and got bored of the arguing so I whispered to the DM "At night time I'm going to slip down and slice the throats of every goblin on board". We came back from the table not long after, our DM simply told the group all goblins appear to have been murdered.. problem solved, the adventure continued, everyone was happy, if not a little suspicious of their new rogue friend.
     
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